Team members: Eric Hansen, Rob Schubach, Rachel Hansen, Erica Hansen, Brittany Mauer
Hometown: Graham, WA, USA
Race vessel: Stiletto 27 Catamaran
Human propulsion: Pedal (prop)
Interview with: Eric Hansen
The first thing you should know about Team Bonesaw is that they describe themselves as “good looking.” No pictures, no proof, like our sexual exploits from summer camp their attractiveness remains somewhere between theoretical and faith-based.
Just as attractive as the flesh vessels of Team Bonesaw is their sea vessel, Jahmbo—a sexy Stiletto 27 catamaran from Florida’s Force Engineering. Rumor has it Jahmbo’s getting a fresh paint job, and she’s dressed to thrill. Did you say epoxy-saturated fiberglass over a Nomex honeycomb core? That’s hot. With fiberglass that’s pre-impregnated with epoxy resin?! We know this is a family show but—damn, we’d knock that up, too.
While everything we have to give the CG-SAR seems to be copy-pasted from Team Bonesaw’s Tinder bios, we’re sure it’ll work out fine. Rumor is the Stiletto 27 is unsinkable, but so was the Titanic, so maybe leave room on any floating doors, just in case. Never let go, folks. Never let go.
We interviewed Eric Hansen from Team Bonesaw over a hypothetical bowl of his own urine to hear his thoughts on this year’s race, going potty, and why do this at all:
What are the necessary components of a good adventure?
People, although a good adventure can be had alone, the right people make it that much better. The non-whiners, those are the right people. I could whine about whiny people but then that would make me a whiner, so I don’t whine about them but I do talk about them, usually behind their back, cause they’re so whiny!
Weather is also nice for a good adventure, but I live in the PNW so that’s not going to happen.
What’s your favorite kind of bracket?
The bracket that’s going to hold my pedal drive together. I’ve only spent countless hours (days, weeks really) and countless sleepless nights trying to figure out how all this $#!@ is going to come together and work! I’m not whining but sometimes I think I’d like to get my money back. Thanks
It’s drizzling, freezing cold, and you’ve missed the tide. The cabin is leaky and the stove won’t light. How do you keep the good vibes going?
If it’s drizzling, freezing cold, peeing in your pants will help warm you up for a little bit and it will go along with the leaky cabin. The stove not lighting could be an issue though, think coffee and then pooping, in that order, not whining just being honest. Again, having the right people onboard makes the difference between can and can’t.
Forget the 10k or the steak knives. What does success look like for you and your team?
Finishing, either ahead of the grim sweeper or behind.
Defend your vessel. What makes it worthy?
So the Stiletto 27 is like a giant party barge, but with less amenities, like comfort and storage. They say it’s unsinkable, not the Titanic unsinkable, but the Nomex core kind of unsinkable. I think it’s also kind of fast and not too technical, so it’s user-friendly. I’m putting some go faster paint on it so that should help as well.
Blank space, baby. Share some things:
It’s funny how when you’re young you can’t wait to turn sixteen cause then you can get a driver’s license and things will be so much better. And then you can’t wait to turn 21 cause then you’re an adult and can drink alcohol and things will be so much better. And then you can’t wait to get into your thirties cause then you’ll have all the answers. Skip the forties. Then the fifties when all your stuff is paid for, there are no more questions and you know the meaning of life and everything is so much better. And then in your sixties you sign up for the R2AK? WTF!
This boat is 3/5ths a family affair. Skills on board include uppers (a barista) and downers (brewer and winemaker). We’ll see if the uppers or downers prevail.