FULL RACE: Port Townsend to Ketchikan
Team name: Team It Ain’t Brain Surgery: it’s BINBA
Team Members: Mark Eastham, Stephane Lesaffre, Jeremey Boyette
Race vessel: F-31 Trimaran
Race Charity: Brain Injury Network of the Bay Area
Bio: It might was well have happened like this: they rolled into the R2AK office one at a time, fanned out of the door and swagger-walked lockstep up to the high counter and rang for service twice, slowly. Ding…ding.
The guy in the middle pushed his aviators down far enough to peek over the top and tell the lady “We’re here to win” then start peeling off hundreds to cover whatever the registration was, laying them on the desk without breaking eye contact.
“What should I put down as your team name?”
“It Ain’t Brain Surgery, darling,” he said pushing up his shades and roiling the toothpick back to the other side.
At this point in the metaphoric fantasy we just made up, their mom cracks the front door and asks them how much longer they are going to be, she’s got bingo at 6 and needs to leave now if she’s drop them off back home first. They could also take the bus…
If you ignore the fact that Mark is a brain surgeon, in the simple act of picking a team name that dismisses the entire thing they signed up to do, Team Ain’t Brain Surgery has the kind of “We’re not impressed by your anything” sort of self-confidence that everyone at the R2AK loves and our patron saint muses Hubris and Irony (also our stripper names) simply adore.
There is no question that this hard charging crew of Trimar-men tested in the fire in the windy crucible of San Francisco Bay have the chops: they’ve crossed oceans in both hemispheres, been formally trained and self-tutored in the ass-kickery of the sea all over the world: jaunts to Hawaii, fleeing Sweden for France, Hong Kong for the Philippines on a 60’ racing tris, then Hobie Catting around the Philippines during a 265 mile race on an open beach cat.
They got fifth, in warm water.
Team Ain’t Brain Surgery is swagger sailing up to the R2AK line with the largest version of “Duh” their mom could tow to Port Townsend: F-31 trimaran. Bigger, faster, more comfy than anything in the 2015 race- solid strategy for the cold water hate mission that is the Race to Alaska. They are totally right, it Ain’t Brain Surgery to stay warm, fend off the bears, your competitors, and hard charge 750 miles to the finish line before the other guy- get a bigger boat and sail the shit out of it in the right wind, while missing the calms, tidal rapids, and all of the driftwood- nature’s little mines that are designed to crack your carbon fiber and fill your hulls with Humility and Seawater (coincidentally our stripper names at that other club.)
All of that, and these guys are using their race to raise money for the brain injury foundation to help out out-patient programs. If they win BINBA will get $20 k (the $10k prize plus $10k matching donations). Pretty cool.
Mabuhay to the R2AK bold souls of Team It Ain’t Brain Surgery. Don’t worry, there is plenty of driftwood out there in case someone knocks that chip off your shoulder.