Excellent Adventure

FULL RACE- Port Townsend to Ketchikan

Team name: Team Excellent Adventure

Team Captain: Bill Gifford

Crew: Ted Sweeney

Race Vessel: Montgomery 17 with a sliding seat rowing station in the cockpit

Ted: Dude, are you sure we should be doing this?
Bill: Ted, you and I have witnessed many things, but nothing as bodacious as what just happened.  Party on Bill, Party on Ted

As teams jockey for position leading up to the start line, we’re discovering there is an intricate game of posturing and intimidation with teams choosing to alternately over/undersell their abilities as part of a nuanced strategy to gain a mental edge over the competition. In that game the most qualified and the least qualified often appear identical, and as far as we can tell Team Excellent Adventure is definitely one of the two.

The Team is led by Bill who claims fifty years of sailing adventures up and down coast as far south as San Diego, round trip voyages to Hawaii, gunkholing in the lower Salish Sea, several marathons, a solo hike along the Pacific Coast Trail. Bill describes himself as a retired geriatric who enjoys sitting in his rocking chair and thinking about the good old days. His race plan boils down to three action items:

  • Make it to Ketchikan
  • Buy a set of steak knives
  • Tell everyone they took second place.

Who is his crew? Forged in the ultra-competitive crucible of Seattle’s Duck Dodge, Ted has literally months of sailing experience.  To underscore this experience the team’s application elaborated that Ted won a hot dog eating contest in the tenth grade and is over a third of the way through the audio version of Moby Dick.  What he lacks in experience, Ted is reported to make up for in apathy.

Is this all a strategic rope-a-dope to throw other teams off the scent, or hard won mediocrity? We’ll let the race decide.